Sean May Say

Ah, Truman looks so content…

Well it’s been a long, long time since we last posted, but the news out of Sacramento today was enough for me to get my journalist juices flowing.   There hasn’t been much traffic on the site for the past 4 months, except for the  numerous porn sites leaving some less than tasteful comments.  We deleted those nice notes, dusted off the old type-writer, and are gearing up for the 2009 Bobcats season.  There have been several changes to the roster - most notably being our center that got taller and came back with less of a tan and more tattoos - and we’ll highlight those moves over the next several weeks, but for today we are only going to discuss the fine gentleman for which we have named this high profile, extremely lucrative website.  Yes, that’s correct, I said lucrative - we are nearing the $50 mark in revenue for 2009.  Anyways…..ladies and gentleman, I’d like to introduce to you the 2009 Sean May!

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The Bobcats beat the Lakers tonight for the 6th time in 7 tries, 94 to 84.  Wallace had a monster game with 21 and 13, while crowd favorite Kobe Bryant scored 25 but on only 11 for 28 shooting.  Apparently his extra pre-game practice wasn’t enough as his tough shooting continues.

Crowd favorite number 2, Sean May, was unable to see any playing time off the bench.  He was however seen multiple times parading around EpiCentre last Saturday.

Both Detroit and Chicago lost tonight, pulling the Bobcats to within 1 game of 8th place and 2 games of 7th.

With the Bobcats clinging to a 17 point lead and just under 3 minutes to play, LB called once again called on Sean May.  Kind words from announcer Stever Martin referring to Sean’s slow return as “a long road to recovery.”  Ummmm….. recovery from obesity???  I must say though, jokes aside, he appears to be getting into shape.  Take a look…

While it wasn’t quite the 5 points he poured in Monday night, he ended up 0-2 with 3 rebounds, 1 turnover, and 1 foul.  Say what you want but he’s consistently putting up numbers.  Not always good numbers, but numbers nonetheless.  KEEP IT UP SEAN!  Two Forks Up!

The title above could mean a couple of things - is Sean ready to notch a 100 point game or is he gonna sleep with 20,000 ladies?

I just got back from the game tonight and boy am I giddy. I think that the SeanMaySay team might single-handedly be responsible for the Sean May resurrection of 2009. I’m not going to lie, we didn’t enter the Cable Box until late in the 2nd quarter, which of course is typical Sean fashion when he’s wearing street clothes. After seeing how well the Cats were playing, we debated as the whether we should even walk a block and a half down to the Arena. I mean, we were at Phil’s and all - we had as good of a chance of seeing Sean at the bar there as we did seeing him play tonight. We sucked it up, walked down, were harassed by scalpers (at halftime) and settled on some decent seats - for 5 bucks. Gotta love the Bobcats playoff push. (continue reading…)

Isn’t it strange how the cycle of the moon has control over a lot of our events? Did you know that women’s periods are tied into the cycle of the moon? 28 days baby! And all sorts of the crazy things happen on nights like yesterday when a full moon comes out - the curse of the werewolf is in full effect, there’s a high number of traffic accidents, and then the higher risk of surgery during a full moon is well documented.  Well here’s a new one - Sean May wears a uniform (don’t worry he picked one up for sale for $15 bucks the other night and they cleared the locker room while he dressed) and then he actually plays a couple minutes!! (Line for the night 0-1 FG, 1 minute)
Thanks to a couple of our avid readers, the pics below prove that he was in the game and that he’s is looking in shape. Look at the first pic - you can almost see a muscle if you squint your eyes and shake your head really fast - try it! In the second pic you can see that he got down the court before anyone else in an effort to say “Hey LB, look at me! I’m Faaaaaaaaaaaaat” Oh wait sorry that was supposed to say “Hey LB, look at me! I’m Faaaaaaaaaaaaassst”

Looks like Sean scored some pretty solids seats to the Duke-Carolina game.  Maybe he jogged there from Charlotte and dropped those final 8 lbs.  Hopefully not. LB better not ruin the team chemistry that has led the Cats to 6 wins in a row.

We have some very exciting news to report to you!!!  While on our way back from our weekly Sunday night trip to the Teeter we ran into the one and only Sean!  He was in the park enjoying the Blizzard of ‘09 while sipping on a cold one, but was kind enough to take the time to let us snap a quick photo of him.  He only had a few seconds to speak to us — but it looks like he may have trimmed down a bit (remember that photos always seem to make people look heavier) and said that he thought that Coach might be ready to play him again this week.  Let us know if you see him around town anywhere else!

It was a great weekend to be a Bobcats fan - two road wins in two games that we could have easily lost.  For those of you who missed that games, check out the picture below.  

We had a courtroom artist on site who drew this up in the 2nd quarter of the game in L.A. on Saturday.  As you can see, Sean was a little bit bloated from the box of ice cream sandwiches that he ate after the head of lettuce, all-you-can-eat crab legs and and half a dozen ears of corn that he had for lunch at the Red Lobster in the Brentwood Mall.  To me, he looks like he might be close to the 260 lbs that Larry wants him…what ya think??

 

Source: Bobcatsplanet.com

Unfortunately it looks like this ocurred when he was still in his “prime” year of 2007.

But think of all of the questions he could have answered for us…

Sean, how did you ever score 32 points vs. the Magic back in December 2006?

Sean, do you think you could stick with Kobayashi in a hot dog eating contest?  What if is was popcorn?

Sean, are you still winded from those 3 minutes that you played on Feb 11th vs. the Wiz?

Sean, do you still feel that your offseason workout program helped you be up for the challenge of 82 games like you mention in this clip?

Sean, how do you gain access to the VIP room at Phil’s?

And lastly, Sean, what bench will you be warming next year?  Thankfully, it won’t be Charlotte….

…then I agree.

Mmm.Yummy!

Two Forks Up!